Primal Battle: Centaur vs Minotaur
UGO asks Neil Gaiman, Ozzy Osbourne, Clive Barker, Brian Posehn, Tiger Woods and many others what may be the burning question of our times: Who would in in a fight: a minotaur armed with a trident or a centaur armed with a crossbow?. We’re betting on the centaur because they have TWO eyes.
10/25/07 at 8:31 am
Both of them have 2 eyes (Centaur with the head of a man and Minotaur with the head of a bull)…you’re thinking of a Cyclops. Mayhaps?
10/25/07 at 8:50 am
Yeah, they both have two eyes, but still…wouldn’t you think that an anatomically correct Minotaur, being bull-headed (ha!), would have its eyes on the side of its head whereas the centaur would have the evolutionary advantage of forward-facing eyes and so would have better depth perception?
10/25/07 at 10:22 am
A centaur has a human mind AND a weapon which can be fired from a distance. If inside the Labyrinth, with close quarters, the match is even. Flaming arrows might help.
10/25/07 at 11:46 am
The fans would win.
10/25/07 at 1:38 pm
Ozzy has the guts to say what was written all over Tiger Woods’ face!
10/25/07 at 1:46 pm
…although Richard Kind’s answer makes the most Hollywood sense.
10/25/07 at 4:24 pm
[…] Primal Battle: Centaur vs Minotaur from THE BEAT […]
10/26/07 at 12:36 am
Hmm..that’s hard to say *exposes geekiness*.
Vs. a normal AD&D Minotaur, I’d give it to the Centaur (using anything other than a hand crossbow w/ normal bolts).
Vs. a bloodsea Minotaur from Dragonlance (which is larger, and more intelligent) I’d give it to the Mino.
:)
10/26/07 at 9:29 am
Why wouldn’t a minotaur have two eyes? Is he supposed to be a pirate minotaur or something?
10/26/07 at 2:10 pm
I would totally pay to see pirate minotaurs.
10/28/07 at 5:58 pm
There has to be a Dragonlance novel out there somewhere with pirate minotaurs…
10/29/07 at 4:57 am
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL ON!
CENTAUR TO WIN HANDS DOWN.
MINOTAUR IS LIKE A WILD STUPID ANIMAL.
CENTAUR HAS BOTH SPEED AND RANGE.
IF YOU SAY OTHERWISE I WILL KILL YOUR FAMILY WITH BOLTS TO BE IRONIC.
10/29/07 at 5:00 am
Well I’m Mike and i’m stupid and ignorant and therefore think that a Minotaur will win. DUHHHHH